I miss something in 'US'

I miss something in 'US' I miss something but I don't know what and how to express what I feel. I miss how we used to be. I miss something about us, about how we talk, about how we laugh, about how we keep each other.

And now, I'm alone in here. Try to be strong each day, try to be a better person for you, to you, and to us. I always believe in God's plan. I'm waiting.

But, each day I try, I don't feel your love to me and to us. I can't feel how you care to me like yesterday, how you talk to me, and everything's change.

I always try to believe there's nothing wrong with our relationship, I always keep in my head 'alone'. I don't let anybody know what I thinking and I don't want anyone to know how I'm feel.

I'm just had you in my life to tell all problems, but now I feel you so far away from me. Now I feel like I don't have anyone and anything.

One thing you should know, I always in love with you whatever happens. I always try to be better person for you. Someday, when the time has come I hope you read this .

SASA♥

Senior High School

Long time no posting anything in my lovely blog. I have much time, but I'm too lazy to write something in my blog.
Now, I'm a part of Tarsisius 1 Senior High School wahaha :D senior high school is so much fun but I can't forget my junior moment.
Just a little 'Hello' from me in this post.
I can't write latter when I'm in a good mood to write :)

Sasa♥

If My Heart Was A House - Owl City

You're the sky that I fell through
And I remember the view
Whenever I'm holding you

The sun hung from a string
Looking down on the world
As it warms over everything

Chills run down my spine
As our fingers entwine
And your sighs harmonize with mine

Unmistakably
I can still feel your heart beat fast
When you dance with me

We got older and I should've known
(Do you feel alive?)
That I feel colder when I walk alone
(Oh, but you'll survive)
So I may as well ditch my dismay
(Bombs away, bombs away)

Circle me and the needle
Moves gracefully back and forth
If my heart was a compass, you'd be north

Risk it all
'Cause I'll catch you if you fall wherever you go
If my heart was a house, you'd be home

It makes me smile because you said it best
I would clearly feel blessed
If the sun rose up from the west

Flower balm perfume
All my clothes smell like you
'Cause your favorite shade is navy blue

I walk slowly when I'm on my own
(Do you feel alive?)
Yeah, but frankly I still feel alone
(Oh, but you'll survive)
So I may as well ditch my dismay
(Bombs away, bombs away)

Circle me and the needle moves
Gracefully back and forth
If my heart was a compass, you'd be north

Risk it all
'Cause I'll catch you if you fall wherever you go
If my heart was a house, you'd be home

If my heart was a house, you'd be home

6/6/11 A Night To Remember

6/6/11
The day to remembered for all 9 grades students in Ricci Junior High School. We laugh together, happy together, and last we also cry together. When the party already over, my teacher make all the students got a flashback from 2008 until 2011.
Friends, all we do over 3 years, no matter what, I always keep remind you all in my mind. Even though I'm not Ricci's student again, but I always remembered you all. I don't want to forget you as my bestfriend. I know we all have too many problems over 3 years, but I can't lie, I always remembered you all as my bestfriends, FOREVER. Thanks God to give me a good friend like them. Especially for Hong, Yovita, Bule, Angel, Iis. Love you so much, I'll miss you buddies :'D

GRADUATED!

 Graduated! Ahhh feeling so great because I wanna leave my junior high school life! Perjuangan 3 taon ngga sia sia deh :D Welcome Senior High School life, hope will be a great life for me!

Nilai gue sih gak bagus yahh, nem malah ga bagus-,- cuma seengganya gue uda bersyukur deh uda dikasih LULUS! Seneng bangeet. Bakal kangen beraat sama masa-masa SMP rawr!

Junior High School already over

3 taon sekolah di SMP Katolik Ricci 1. Bener-bener sangat amat engga berasa. 3 taon serasa cuma ngejalaninnya setahun doang disekolah ini. Dari bulan April kemaren anak kelas 9 udah disibukin sama dengan yang namanya try out, ulangan umum, ujian praktek, UAS, dan UAN. Bener-bener pulang paling ga ngenakin. Semua numpuk dan otak ga berenti muter itu rasanya. mumeettt.
Eh tapi sekarang udah selesai semua sih penderitannya, tinggal nunggu tgl 4 Juni entar deh. Pengumuman hasil kelulusan meenn. Sebenernya selama nungguin tgl 4 Juni itu gue dan anak kelas 9 semua uda libur, paling dateng ke sekolah cuma buat ngurusin Farewell dan gladi resik segala macamnya itu. Bowriinnggg deyyhh. Mending tidur dirumah hihihi (saya tau saya curhat) tapi saya cuma berharap nanti tanggal 4 Juni semua siswa siswi SMP Katolik Ricci 1 lulus semua 100% !!! Amin Amin Amin

Sekarang gue mau curhatttttt neh! Ah rasanya berat sih ninggalin sekolah tercintahh ini (agak lebay) eh cuma tapi bener loohhh ada ga sih yang ga bilang masa masa SMP nya itu ga indah. Sebagian orang pasti bilang masa SMP itu masa-masa paling indah tapi SMA lebih indah lagi. Cuma emang gue akui masa SMP gue sangat amat berharga banget dan ga akan pernah gue lupain sampe kapanpun apalagi temen-temen yang paling gue cintahi. emwah. Di SMP banyak sekali kenangannya ya dari yang paling manis, manis, pait, paling pait, dan asem.... Cuma ya itudeh namanya juga SMP isinya semua remaja ababil pasti ya gitudeh ya tau sendiri.
SMA gue uda gak di Ricci lagi melainkan di Tarsisius 1, ah bakal kangen beratt sama ceman ceman yang sudah mewarnai hidupkuu selama 3 tahun ini. Will miss you guys! Will miss all my teacher and all my memories in Ricci :)

ini pas retret di Cinangneng

kls 9B yang gahoel gayanya

SCREEAAAMMMMM !

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Really. This holiday is so fucking bored. No money! Too many things I want to bought, but NO MONEY. Okey, I hate it so much. I'm just 15 years old girl but I want to find a job so I can have some money $.$ Whatever guys, if you think I'm mercenary. But, that's human. A-normal-human I mean. Every human need money and nobody's don't like money, am I wrong? My mother always said "You must be a mercenary people, because this world is totally going insane!" Yap, I'm really understand. So guys, my followers or people who blog walking, please tell me if you have a job to 15 years old girls. Don't forget I live in Jakarta.

WHEN YOU'RE GONE

Sometimes, when I really love one song I truly love it because the lyric same as my feeling right now. Now, I really love to hear When You're Gone - Avril Lavigne. Let's sing with me :D

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
And when you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

And when you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah

And all I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
And when you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too

And when you're gone
All the words I need to hear will always get me through
The day and make it ok
I miss you

HATE me

Well, me just me

Hate me if you want because I'm not the perfect one

If you hate me, that's your problem

Solve your problem by your own

Hate me? That's your choice

Everyone have their own enemies

I have enemies and YOU have enemies

Enjoy life

Because.....

Life without enemies

is NOT INTEREST

so, enjoy hate people!

YOU AND ME ♥

I knew from the moment we kissed that you where the man that I would spend the rest of my life with. I have had feelings for other boys, But I have never felt this way before. We have our challenges in this relationship but we overcome them because of the love we share. We argue all the time and sometimes we even breakup, but through everything we go through I never once stopped loving you. You truly are too good to be true. I know that I could tell you my deepest secret in this world and you will never repeat it to anyone else. You are something like my place of comfort, whenever I’m feeling down you can say two words and my whole world brightings up. And for some reason if we can't be together anymore, I want you to know that at this exact moment you mean everything to me, People can say we’re to young to know what love is, but I’ve never seen a woman look at a man the way I look at you. We have something really special together that is way deeper then love. You should know that despite what happens between us after today, you have my heart. 

♥  Me

100 FACTS ABOUT ME

#100factsaboutme is on trending topic now. I want to write that on twitter but I think it's too much. So, I write 100 facts about me in my blog :) Let's check!

#1 I'm a girl

#2 I'm weird

#3 easy envy with other people

#4 if you don't know me of course you think that I'm arrogant. But if you know who I am, it nice

#5 People talk that I'm funny (on my own)

#6 I have two sisters

#7 I have a super duper PARENTS

#8 I believe in GOD

#9 I'm Christian

#10 I'm fans of Jonas Brother

#11 I'm fans of Jay Chou

#12 I love watch horor movie

#13 I love fashion

#14 I love Chocolate

#15 I love Yellow

#16 I love listen to the music that represent my feelings

#17 I love listen to the music loudly when I'm going freaky

#18 I love to laugh

#19 I love my friends of course

#20 I love my HATERS 

#21 I love Henry Liau !

#22 I hate them who's so annoying

#23 I hate them who act like they know everything about me

#24 I hate them who is so arrogant

#25 I hate them who lying with me

#26 I hate them who so stingy

#27 I hate them who so excessive

#28 I hate them who can't tell the truth to me

#29 I hate them who think that he/she's so perfect

#30 I hate them who's so spoiled

#31 I hate it when I have a good mood than someone break my mood

#32 I hate it when I want to go to somewhere then sudden it's rainy

#33 I hate it when the weather is so hot

#34 When the weather is so hot my mood is so bad

#35 I hate them who's play with people heart

#36 I always bring my phone everywhere I go

#37 I always sing that song when I really like it

#38 I always cheat with my friends when the teacher is not looking at me

#39 I hate fighting with the person I love the most.

#40 I sing and dance when nobodys home.

#41 I hate girls who say they hate drama, when really they're the cause of it all.

#42 I hate when my text fails to send and I don't realize it for hours.

#43 I always ask someone something knowing the truth, just to see if they will lie to me.

#44 I always wondering and dreaming about my future

#45 I love to spend my time in the bathroom

#46 I hate to wake up in the morning

#47 I always sleppy when I'm in the class

#48 I always sleppy when I want to start study

#49 I love singing even though I know my voice is worse

#50 I can't sleep without my bolsters

#51 I love to hear story from my friends

#52 I really want to go to Paris and New York

#53 I love kids

#54 I hate insects

#55 I hate people who's so noisy

#56 I'm lazy

#57 I'm kind of a person who can't see anyone suffer

#58 I love to make an experience

#59 I love to cook some food although I know I can't cook

#60 I hate when I see my weigh

#61 I love basketball so much

#62 I always forget where I put my phone

#63 I always wonder if I live in the harry potter world

#64 I always wish that I have doraemon

#65 I can't pretend to long

#66 I hate waiting

#67 I hate when I don't have no more money

#68 I love shopping

#67 I hate when my blanket falls off the bed when I'm sleeping

#68 I hate when someone make me scared when I'm alone in home

#69 I love my mother cooking

#70 I'm a cancer

#71 I love to write something in my notebook

#72 I hate Monday

#73 I love Saturday

#74 I'm not beautiful like you. I'm beautiful like me. Just the way I'm.

#75 I always see the mirror whenever I want to go out 

#76 For sure, I hate start the conversation first

#77 I hate people who too busy with other people problem

#78 I hate my own problem
#79 I hate myself if making someone cry

#80 I hate someone who is so flirty

#81 I love to talk

#82 I hate it when I don't know the answer than the teacher asking to me

#83 I'm foolish

#84 I'm nerd

#85 I hate when teacher says "you have a homework"

#86 I don't really like chili

#87 I'm not strong enough

#88 I'm ordinary people with an extraordinary live

#89 I always memorize the lyric of the songs who I really like

#90 easy to memorize lyric, hard to memorize lessons

#91 I love waking up in the middle of the night knowing I still have time to sleep.... before school

#92 I really want to have a good body

#93 I want to be more skinny

#94 I always ask my friends for the same questions

#95 I have three best friends

#96 I always want to get everything that I can't have

#97 I'm not confident with myself

#98 I hate when someone ask me something that I don't know want to answer and they force me

#99 I hate when alarm clock or someone wake me up when I sleep

#100 99 things about me, so you can describe me now! :)

THESE MONTH

TGIF! This week is super crazy. This week is success make me stressfull enough, actually this month. Exaammmm attack. Super lazy being 9 grade on junior high school bcause this month is full of exam

I just don't have any time for me and my friends to hang out and Im so damn hate that.

Next week is practice exam and two weeks latter is school exam and then national exam. Really really make my brain streessss! I wish I have remote control so I can fast and slow the time LOL

Then, I stress enough think about my relanthionship. I think I'm not good enough to be a good partner. So, that assessment make me stress enough

And one of the stressfullness that I have this month, I have one problem that I don't have any money. 

Really really want to have money tree *wish

Oh God, please make the time faster until April! 

Can't wait until I being FREE!

Wait.....

Wait for the guy who will be your best friend. The person who will drop everything to be with you at any time of the day, no matter what. The guy who makes you smile like no other guy can and when he looks at you.. you know he needs you. The guy who thinks you’re beautiful even when your hair’s a mess and you have no make-up on. The one who will call you just to hear your voice. But most of all, wait for the guy who will put you at the center of his universe, cause obviously he’ll be at the center of yours.

Grow Together

I want to grow old with you if I can. I hope you read this. You must know that I love you so much, but I can't show that Im rellay love you more than anything. I just can tell I love you but I can't show that I love you. I hope you know that you're the best thing that ever be mine. You always mad at me but you must know I can't mad at you anymore. You may hate me because my stupid mistake, Im sorry for all the things I do and make you angry but I don't mean that. I just afraid, Im just afraid of losing you. Im just afraid if someone make you happy easier, make you laugh easier than me. Im afraid because Im not pretty girl, Im afraid if someone more than make you not love me again. Im just afraid, really. I hope you know that :')

Love Me  ت 

HALOOOO!

Blaaaahhhh! Long time not posting. Busy! Maybe until april I must study hard and then I can fly like a bird. FREE! Ohhh God, can't wait 'till I go to Senior High School!!
Whoa whoa whoa, how's your life guys?
Okay! Forget the exam and all the task in you head. So, do you remember? This month is love month! Haha maybe some guy tell to someone who he loves in this month. Wohhooo how lucky thats girl? So romantiiicccc!
Hmmm... I just wanna ask you guys? Do you have someone you love? If you had, show that before too late!

Hoaaahhh okaaayy! I just want to post something (not important) today. Because today I'm free not doing anything so I can post somethin but it's too boring I think-_-
So, maybe you want to look videos? Haha hereee!

Lonliness vs. Aloneness

“The aloneness is total and complete. Not loneliness but aloneness. Loneliness is always concerned with others; aloneness is concerned with oneself.” -Osho

I am slowly learning the difference. Yes I would like a love of my own most days. A lover to have and to hold, to spoil, to sing to, to write to, to paint, one who inspires me. One to share things with, to cuddle, to give to, and learn from. 

However being alone is not a bad thing. The joy of being just yourself. It can be a very easy task to be there for others, but a difficult one to be alone. We are born alone, we live alone, and we will eventually leave this earth alone. Alone in the sense that at the end of the day, you will be with yourself. I have been my own worst enemy, and its time to become my own best friend. If I cannot be with myself comfortably, and love myself, I will be in no condition to comfortably be with someone else, and love that person to the best of my ability. For we hold expectations, and when they fall short, we are deeply disappointed. Love will not hold any expectations, it just is. And that is exactly what I aim to be. Just love. All I can do is be a person who loves and be loved in return. And that is my intent, to love, and love myself in return. In hopes that one day I will share my whole self with another. 

Unfaithfull - Rihanna

Story of my life, searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul 'cause it seems that wrong
Really loves my company

He's more than a man and this is more than love
The reason that the sky is blue
But clouds are rolling in because I'm gone again
And to him I just can't be true

And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Every time I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside

I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be a murderer

I feel it in the air as I'm doing my hair
Preparing for another date
A kiss up on my cheek, he's here reluctantly
As if I'm gonna be out late

I say I won't be long just hanging with the girls
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we both know where I'm about to go

And we know it very well

Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Every time I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside

I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be a murderer

Our love, his trust
I might as well take a gun
And put it to his head
Get it over with
I don't wanna do this
Anymore, anymore

And I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
And every time I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside

And I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be a murderer
A murderer, no no no
Yeah

Busy Time

Groaaaaaaaaa, Im 9 grade and now is the time that I must prepare all of my lessons to national exam and school exam. Well, I know my raport before is not-too-good SO! I must prepare from now 'till exam latter. The exam start from March until April. We be examined, and if I do the exam as well I can use white-grey uniform, it's mean I am Senior High School. can't wait being senior student :p
So, followers, please always bless me to pass all that exam, bless me so I can be more diligent to study *'casue I really lazy for study, really*


I don't hope too much, I don't hope my score is best but I just hope I can pass that exam. But, if I can I want to get the best score I ever get before :D
God Bless me for all my exam latter and God bless you all tho those who bless me or not bless me :))


Um.. And then for sure this last three month until April I too busy to prepare my exam so I can't post like old, I mean before I post almost everyday but from now I think I can't post anything to my blog everyday because I must prepare my exam, Thankyou ;)

Today My Life Begins - Bruno Mars

i've been working hard so long
seems like pain has been my only friend
my fragile heart's been done so wrong
i wondered if i'd ever heal again

ohh just like all the seasons never stay the same
all around me i can feel a change (ohh)

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me
leave the past behind me, today my life begins
a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking
i know i can make it, today my life begins

yesterday has come and gone
and i've learn how to leave it where it is
and i see that i was wrong
for ever doubting i could win

ohh just like all the seasons never stay the same
all around me i can feel a change (ohh)

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me
leave the past behind me, today my life begins
a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking
i know i can make it, today my life begins

life's to short to have regrets
so i'm learning now to leave it in the past and try to forget
only have one life to live
so you better make the best of it

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me
leave the past behind me, today my life begins
a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking
i know i can make it, today my life begins

i will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me
leave the past behind me, today my life begins
a whole new world is waiting it's mine for the taking
i know i can make it, today my life begins
today my life begins...


HERE TO DOWNLOAD

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011

maybe it's late post but no problem !

Welcome 2011, new year, new challenges, New chances, But the same me  ♥

Believe me 2011 will be the greates year you ever have :)

In 2010, I made mistakes. Met lots of Bitches, Haters & Assholes, but I met lots of new friends too. I did things that I shouldn’t do. I was too busy looking at the past. What Freakin Happens.. happens, that’s all I can say. 2011 will be my year :) I ain’t longer thinking about my regrets. Shits gonna happen when I don’t want it to, but there’s a reason behind it all. Someday, it will all make perfect sense or maybe, it won’t. Not my problem!


For my 2011 wish, I wish ....

• In relantionship with someone who I love. I hope he is the right person.
• Have a good relathion with my friends
• Meet Jonas Brother 
• Have new friends in new school
• No more tears
• No more haters / bitches
• Always be my family
• ALL THE BEST FOR ME! :)

AT LEAST I SAY HAPPY NEW YEAR ! CLICK THIS !!